If you’ve never read these, they’re absolutely brilliant. No difference from the things you find on bathroom walls today.
A few favorites:
Weep, you girls. My penis has given you up. Now it penetrates men’s behinds. Goodbye, wondrous femininity!
Restitutus says: “Restituta, take off your tunic, please, and show us your hairy privates”.
Amplicatus, I know that Icarus is buggering you. Salvius wrote this.
If anyone sits here, let him read this first of all: if anyone wants a screw, he should look for Attice; she costs 4 sestertii.
We have wet the bed, host. I confess we have done wrong. If you want to know why, there was no chamber pot
The one who buggers a fire burns his penis
Let everyone one in love come and see. I want to break Venus’ ribs with clubs and cripple the goddess’ loins. If she can strike through my soft chest, then why can’t I smash her head with a club?
SERIOUSLY GUYS READ THEM ALL.
Reblogging my themeblog here because I love these.
“Theophilus, don’t perform oral sex on girls against the city wall like a dog” omg
oh man I reblogged this and then I actually went to the link and saw this:
“We two dear men, friends forever, were here. If you want to know our names, they are Gaius and Aulus.”
and now I have feelings? T_T
“I screwed a lot of girls here.”
We learned about these all the time in Classical Bodies. Apparently, dick jokes abounded.
"Defecator, may everything turn out okay so that you can leave this place"
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